FACING THE MUSIC: ROTARY SOUND OF MUSIC AUDITIONS LIKE FACING HOWIE MANDEL AND SIMON COWELL

Mark Clairmont | MuskokaTODAY.com

BRACEBRIDGE — “5, 6, 7, 8 … step, step, pirouette, and you’re done. Take a bow.”

You think America’s Got Talent — try Muskoka.

Standing in front of Howie Mandel and Simon Cowell would’ve seemed easier last weekend for a bunch singers and dancers who faced the music of auditioning for the Sound of Music, the Bracebridge Rotary Club’s 45th annual musical.

For those with a resting heart rate of, say 60 — and who are light on their toes — it was a cakewalk. No problem for the dozens from the pent-up community theatre world who have plenty of experience on stage with Mamma Mia!, Matilda, Sister Act and so many more memorable top notch theatrical performances across Muskoka.

Trust me. It’s one thing to do the hokey-pokey or go “allemande left” and “circle all.”

But appearing in the Rotary Youth Centre before the judicial panel of seasoned Muskoka directors, producer, choreographer, vocal coach and music conductor is as daunting as AGT — without getting calls from home to help you sway the judging.

Butterflies? How about gut-wrenching pangs of stomach and leg cramps.

On the other side of the table scrutinizing each and every step and pirouette for just the right character move were producer Jean Polak, director Emma Phillips, assistant director Earl Sacrey, musical director Neil Barlow and choral director Fran Harvey.

Out front putting us through our paces was choreographer Natalie Hoolans whose “simple steps” we attempted to follow twice with recorded music. Then we were on our own. Mr. Music, please!

Step, step, pirouette. You’re done. See you in the board room to read your choice of lines for von Trapp family characters from the play.

Choreographer Natalie Hoolans runs the chorus line through some “simple steps” as MGT judges cast their eyes on their feet as part one of the dancing, singing and line recitations that followed at the Rotary Youth Centre in Bracebridge last weekend. Photos Larry Carroll

Oh, and hopefully you brought a song that captures your vocalise at its pitch perfect best.

Something Good. Do-Re-Mi. Sixteen Going On Seventeen. Or Edelweiss would be nice.

Something Good or it will be So Long Farewell.

For me, These are but a few of My Favourite Things to sing about.

“But keep it short,” reminds Sacrey sounding joyfully with the droll sense of humour of an AD.

Unless you’re a Julia Andrews, of course, auditioning for Maria — “Maria!”

And good luck!

Thanks. This baritone will need it going up against a teenager and an 11-year-old, both with beautiful, sweet soprano voices singing Hallelujah! Aye yai yai! Mama mia. If I Were A Rich Man …. Simon and Howie would make me a star and I wouldn’t have to audition.

‘Muskoka’s Got Talent’ judges: Earl Sacrey, left, assistant director; Natalie Hoolans choreographer; Emma Phillips director; Jean Polak producer and Rotarian; Neil Barlow musical director; and Fran Harvey choral director were kind and friendly in a face-to-face under the glaring lights of the Rotary board room metres from those auditioning who got to sing ever so sweetly and recite quick lines from a part in the Sound of Music.
Molly McKenna trades lines with assistant director Earl Sacrey after singing a beautiful rendition of Hallelujah!

It’s a scene played out for decades. One that can’t truly be scripted — though several writers have tried most notably Chorus Line and strangely Chicago.

Cattle calls are notorious among actors, singers and dancers who get a far too fleeting a moment in the spotlight. They dance on and are played off — or more accurately get the old showbiz hook when the director says: “Thanks, that’s good, we’ve seen enough.”

Luckily the generous Rotary judges are far more compassionate and understanding.

All of them have been in this position and in tap shoes before.

Like longtime producer and Rotarian Polak who played Fiddler’s Teyve in Grade 8.

She and her panel have the enviable task of putting together another talented, which will hit the boards next month for rehearsals leading the late February and early March weekend productions at the Rene Caisse Theatre. (Huntsville Rotary is doing their own show this year after sharing a joint stage production with Bracebridge.)

But the unenviable role of casting about and saying: “Don’t call us — we’ll email you.”

It’s all in fun, good spirit and for a worthy cause, Rotary’s winter fundraiser.

An entertaining event that’s the highlight of the white season for theatre lovers, who this coming year will be as anxious to get out at are the artists on stage and working behind the scenes.

For Polak and her team Rotary Musicals are a serious, year-round project.

Not only are there four months of rehearsals for those who got the email offer. The rest of the year is filled with finding a play or sorting through musical they wished they’d produced before but somehow chose another. Then there’s getting the rights, budgeting, planning the logistics of set building and costumes, getting a band, recruiting back of house support staff, scheduling rehearsals and this time monitoring COVID testing.

All volunteers.

This week it’s not all about your feet or voice, it’s keeping your thumbs on your inbox looking for an email offer to sing and dance, act and perform.

Talk about Climb Every Mountain. If the Alps are ever going to be as alive they will never echo moreso beautifully as this year’s Rotary Sound of Music cast.

I Have Confidence.

“If I Were A Rich Man … yada, yada, yada dum. I wouldn’t have to work hard, Howie Mandel and Simon Cowell would make me star and I wouldn’t have to audition,” says Mark Clairmont who tried out for a part in Rotary’s Sound of Music.

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