SOBER SECOND THOUGHTS ON BRAVE NEW WORLD OF CARNEY’S CANADA
Mark Clairmont | MuskokaTODAY.com
PARRY SOUND-MUSKOKA — If Pierre Poilievre loses his seat, how is it most voters locally stuck with Scott Aitchison?
And did the Liberals really advance their cause — or was it Richter’s big mean Green machine volunteers who made all the difference? Geordie Sabbagh counted on them and for half his votes and the NDP’s Heather Hay for most of the rest.
And what if …?
A lot of if, ands and butts … from a scribe with an election hangover.
Fight! Fight! Fight. Pierre Poilievre sounded ever like Donald Trump as he vowed to hang on to his leadership by the seat of his pants after his butt-kicking. His concession speech lacked but the raised fist and bloodied ear. Only his nose was bloodied and no pride to lose.
If Aitchison had won the Conservative leadership race … could he have been PM? Or perhaps now the next interim leader?
He was certainly on the defence of his beloved PP yesterday. But see next week if the party axes their leader by throwing him under his press-less campaign bus; and PS-M’s third-term MP could be dusting off his leadership signs.
“Hey, hey! Markie boy”
What if the PM’s name was Art Carney instead of Mark Carney …?
Carney should get along with “47 below 49” when next they text, er, speed date.
The Marvel-ous Captain Canada, too, was all Trumpian in his victory speech with “Build baby build.”
This follows ‘Thee’ President who wants to “Burn baby burn” — a fracking stupid phrase associated with the 1965 Watts Riots and the R&B disc jockey, Magnificent Montague.
Alas, such is how Trump-speak has not only changed global politics and culture, but also all other non-English “foreign” languages he refers to.
Goldilocks must be still miffed at us burning down his (White) house.
Lucky for Canada our own big house 24 Sussex is now rodent-free after Mini Me Pierre T. abandoned it, his wife and now Parliament Hill. The latter an all too Commons practice.
Back to what ifs ….
What if the re-in-Carney-ation of the Liberals was led by Trudeau Two? Would half of us Canadians be cheering today?
Grocery store sightings aside, the former PM who left “Justin time” was noticeable by his absence Monday. Probably waiting for Galen Weston’s home delivery. Though there will be no tag days or benefits for Mr. T. For he Left, no doubt, with a generous Parliamentary pension and save for party golden handshake. Not that Canada’s most eligible bachelor needs any of gratuitous gratuities. Watch for him and his “nice hair” jet-setting on the Riviera or at a certain cottage on the east side of Muskoka near Baysville this summer.
Right-on whoopin’
On the topic of sovereign leader Facetimes and strange bedfellows, how about that whoopin’ Premiere Ford took from his former BFF Jamil Jivani? Right on!
The new west Toronto Tory MP despises Dougie, bemoaning him and his PCs for not being true Blue enough — save for PS-M.
If — again — you look at the results finally of Monday. Even without Ontario, Carney wins 100-91.
So this auteur is Left to scratch his follicly-challenged head as to why Ford and Carney are such java joes? Can it be their hard on for Trump tariffs or a shared love for Chrystia Freeland? Cabinet contenders will be watching closely in coming weeks as will she; and Caroline Mulroney whose name has been bandied around as Brian Jr. federal party successor.
One more thing. After watching election celebrations Mr. U.S.A. proved he Trumps Carney on the dance floor where he’s go more “moooves like Jagger” with his one-two, left, right, shimmy shake.
Finally what if … the Senators win tomorrow?
Will Carney get the call-up in goal for Ford’s Leafs Nation team in Game 7 Saturday night in the provincial capital? Or will he stay at home and stand on guard in his new Ottawa riding in Canada’s federal capital city?
Just in case Trump comes up the Rideau Canal.
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